it's jakarta

Jakarta is my hometown. I was born and raised in this city. Jakarta is a big city which is also the capital of Indonesia. There are so many buildings in Jakarta. In the center of Jakarta there is a national monument that is most known as Monas, there is also Istiqlal Mosque the biggest mosque in Jakarta, also a train station known as Stasiun Gambir. Most buildings in this area of Jakarta are government buildings and offices and this area of Jakarta is where most people work that's why every workday morning there is usually and almost always a traffic jam and this makes our body become tired because a lot of our time is wasted on the way and back from work or school. That's why now there is trans jakarta which is a kind of bus that really helps people get to work without getting caught in traffic. Not only to get to work, but some people also ride trans jakarta to go to other places that the bus stops at. This bus really helps Jakarta and the people because with it, traffic jams can be less than before.
If we see the south of Jakarta, most of the buildings are mall, plaza, houses, apartments, schools, and others. In this area of Jakarta, most of the buildings are shopping centers. There is Pondok Indah Mall or people say PIM (1 & 2 ), Plaza Senayan or PS, Senayan City, Cilandak Town Square, Blok M Plaza. To find souvenirs some people go to Pasaraya, but most people who come here are tourists. There is also an are, Kemang, here there are many cafe's which are usually used for birthday parties, in here there's also some boutiques and other shops. In this area there are also many tourists. For people especially teenagers usually go to Plaza Melawai, Pasar Blok M, ITC, and also distros. This area is the area where people go have a break from work. That's why usually there is a traffic jam on Saturdays.In the north of Jakarta there is Mangga Dua a shopping center, Mall Kelapa Gading (1,2, & 3), Dufan in Ancol where many families spend their holidays for refreshing.
If I describe every part of Jakarta it can be really long. Jakarta is a wonderful city. We can see many different areas. There are also many historical buildings which are nice to see and also many shopping centers for those who love to shop. It's fun being in Jakarta for many years although it's a hot ad sunny city, but it's a great place to live in.

Thanks for posting, you need to be focus on your target reader, and your writing is influenced by spoken language. Will discuss this matter in class.